Skip to main content

Short Buffed Asian Guys (SBAGs)


I've always wanted to be tall. That didn't work out so well and I've settled for getting bigger. So now I lift weights, a pastime that I've taken up in fits and starts over the years.

I thought about drinking protein shakes to get huge. Judy said no. She said I don't want you to become one of those guys. The Short Buffed Asian Guy (SBAG).

It seems I'm not the only one to consider this approach. Legions of SBAGs testify to this. And it seem like the shorter you are, the more muscular you have to be in order to compensate for one's lack of height. I don't know any tall buffed Asian guys (Jeremy Lin does not count - he clearly has a neck). So what's with this phenomenon?

First, Asian men are on average shorter than American men. And in my book, anyone 5'8" or under is short (which includes me). There are all kinds of insecurities that go with being short, especially for men. You look up to people. You make less money. You feel less masculine. You feel invisible to girls. If you're balding, its easier to detect. You get mistaken for a hobbit. People pet you. When you hug someone taller, their shoulder hits you in the neck or they crouch down in order to make you feel better worse.

Second of all, there are even more insecurities associated with being an Asian guy. Slight in stature, good at math and computers, passive, timid, and fearful. Blah, blah, blah.

My impetus for every weightlifting stint was a traumatizing social encounter. My brother calls me a skinny little guy. I receive unsatisfactory results from a body fat composition test (Judy's idea). I get pushed around in a basketball game by guys I will never be anywhere near as big or as strong as. Regardless of the type of stigma, the shame provides me with the momentary urge to build pectoral muscles that can reach out and grab you.

But whenever I see an SBAG, I can't help but feel like its one big, bulging, veiny overcompensating mechanism. Its like this guy is wearing his insecurity on his sleeves (and chest, back, and legs). "Hey look I'm a short Asian guy so I lift weights to feel better about myself".

If you're an Asian guy, you can't win in my book. I'll judge you if you're skinny and weak. I'll judge you if you're an SBAG. And I'll judge you if you're in between because you're a wanna-be SBAG. See, I feel conflicted about what masculinity looks like and whether I make the cut. And the judgment of my peers reveals the depth of my insecurity. The issues I see in others are just a mirror reflecting back my own. The most traumatizing encounter is not social, its the voice in my head.

Comments

  1. Nice article. I don't remember you being short (I think I last saw you about 10 years ago), but I do remember that you had a big personality. Height is overrated anyway.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thanks Ann. Skinny guys don't look as short. Height is certainly over-rated but coming from an above-average in height female, I take that comment with a grain of salt.

      Delete
  2. You sound like a fucking pussy. So youre telling me that you refuse to better yourself because of what a woman says, or because of how society would perceive you? Take up knitting and never leave the corner Judy has set up for you so lovingly. One of my best friends is Asian, about 5'5", 220, and is married to a beautiful woman 3 inches taller then him. So a girl turned you down because youre too short? Fuck her, shes a bitch, move on. Dont post an emasculating entry about it. Ive known women that said 6' even was too short. Dont base your confidence on what others think of you, especially women that are pretentious and entitled enough to consider you less than human for something you cant control.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Dad's Review of Passport 2 Purity

[3,100 words, 11 minute read] The sex talk is one of the most dreaded conversations parents anticipate having with their children. To make things easier, an entire industry exists to help parents with sex education. Dozens of books have been written to help parents navigate this treacherous topic with their progeny. One of the best known among evangelicals is called the Passport 2 Purity Getaway package . It is produced by FamilyLife, a division of Cru (former Campus Crusade for Christ) and consists of a five lecture CD package including a journal and exercises designed as a weekend retreat for a pre-pubescent child and his/her parent(s). Passport 2 Purity was not my initiative. Our trip came about because Judy had heard from several home-schooling mom friends how they had taken their daughters on a road trip to go through the CDs. She even heard how a mom took a trip with husband and two sons to through the curriculum. So a couple months ago, Judy suggested we take our two older boy...

Why Asians Run Slower

My brother got me David Epstein's book The Sports Gene . It is a fascinating quick read. If you're interested in sports and science, it will enthrall you.  I finished it in three days. Epstein's point is that far more of an athlete's performance is due to genetics than due to the so-called "10,000 hour" rule promulgated by books such as Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell and Talent is Overrated by Geoff Colvin (both which are very good). The 10,000 hour rule states that any person can reach expert level of performance in a sport if they devote 10,000 hours of deliberate and intentional practice.  That's a lot of hours. Most people aren't capable of anywhere close. And that's precisely Epstein's point. Someone who devotes 10,000 hours of sport-specific practice is likely genetically gifted for the sport in extraordinary ways AND genetically gifted in their ability to persevere and benefit from practice. Therefore, a person who can pra...

Asian American Christians' Secret Affair with Whiteness

Sometimes ideas linger in the back of one’s mind like dirt at the bottom of a swimming pool - dormant, unnoticed yet hiding in plain sight. They are left lying at the edge of one’s consciousness for years because they’re too unsettling and difficult to articulate. Only when a cleaning implement rustles them that one becomes aware of how filthy the environment really is.  For decades, I had suspected an affair might exist but the fact of it eluded me until a recent disruption. The problem with this tryst  is that it ’ s hidden from one of the partners. The relationship functions at the subconscious level. The rustling started with conversations some friends and I had about race, ethnicity, and culture. This dialogue birthed a desire to read a book or study a curriculum together on the topic. One friend recommended Daniel Hill’s White Awake , a book about diagnosing the hidden cancer of white supremacy in American evangelicalism. Earlier this week some members o...