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Favorite Nonfiction Books by Women

What non-biographical, nonfiction books authored by women have you read? “I want to read some books written by women” said my pastor buddy, who was talking about goals for his sabbatical. He talked about how his literary worldview had been almost exclusively shaped by men and it was a huge deficit he wanted to address. To that end, I’ve noticed when I ask female readers what they read, almost invariably they tell me fiction. When I ask male readers what they read, it’s usually more of a mix - both fiction and non-fiction. And I’ve noticed when it comes to fiction, women will read both male and female authors. But men, whether they read fiction or non-fiction, will read exclusively male authors. Men will always recommend male authors and I can’t remember the last time anyone, male or female, recommended a non-fiction book written by a woman.  I think most men, me included, tend to believe non-fiction books written by women are intended for a female audience. There are cer

Relationship Habits Compound

I recently taught my kids about the power of compounding . It’s a finance term that refers to the exponential growth of an investment. You invest a small sum of money which earns an annual return that is re-invested and over time, accumulates into a large sum. Compounding has a  snowball effect . The chart above demonstrates how saving the exact amount but starting ten years earlier can make a huge difference. Emily contributes 33% more than Dave but ends up with twice as much wealth because of the additional time her money has spent compounding. Finance bloggers extend the principle of compounding to other areas of life . One example is mountain biking . They write about how a skill can be broken down into various incremental steps or sub-skills. Working on one sub-skill at a time generates a compounding effect. I have been playing basketball for over thirty years. My body has deteriorated in the past decade but I’ve continued to work on my skill set. In my teens, I played as often

How are we "not under law"? Part I: Unpacking the Dilemma

Romans 6:14 For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under  law  but under grace. In Christian circles, one of the worst labels you can be tagged with is “legalist” or have a behavior you advocate called “legalistic”. It means you emphasize externals rather than the heart. It means you’re Pharisee - keeping the outside clean but enabling corruption on the inside. Christian doctrine explains we are justified by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. Works are opposed to faith (Ephesians 2:8-9). Therefore, you cannot be made righteous on the basis of your good deeds, performance, or behavior.  And yet the Bible is full of injunctions regarding outward behavior - good deeds and religious works. In fact, the list of biblical imperatives drastically outnumber the faith-identity passages. Imagine you took a cursory glance at both the Old and New Testament and segregated scripture passages in two categories: imperatives governing behavior vs. faith-identity. Now if you

Why go to college?

My oldest son is now a high school junior. Amidst ministry and raising four children, my wife and I haven’t devoted significant time to college research and admissions. In a panic over this, I recently went to the library and checked out six test prep books for the SAT, ACT, and PSAT. I was overwhelmed by how much stuff is out there and realized I should have started preparing for this years ago. I’m fully aware there are parents out there who have invested many hours plotting out their child’s path to elite college admission and don’t even have children yet.  I want to jump on the college admissions treadmills and start sprinting as fast as possible to catch up.   I ’ve learned enough about myself that w hen I ’ m caught up in this  frenzy, it’s helpful to pause and ask, “Why am I doing this?" That ’s exactly the question my friend and fellow UC Berkeley alum,  Iris Chen, has been asking about her kids ’  education.  She  has two young sons and recently started a b

The Otherness of Being Asian American

Identifying as Asian American means being woke. That’s a tough pill for most Asian Americans to swallow.  Jay Caspian Kang’s insightful NY Times article got me thinking about Asian American identity and masculinity. At first glance, this piece about 20-year old Michael Deng’s death during a weekend fraternity getaway seems to be an expose on the excesses of fraternity hazing. That’s absolutely not what it’s about - as the title should indicate but the majority of commenters seems to miss.   Through the lens of an Asian American fraternity’s initiation ritual, Kang highlights the challenges of defining an Asian American identity. The article concerns the trial of four of Deng’s fraternity brothers for their involvement in the death of Deng. Ultimately, Kang’s article is not so much about ethnicity but a man’s hunger for belonging and the male need to define and express their identity through aggression. I didn’t realize I was Asian American until I moved to Atlanta in eigh

The Book of Mormon Musical: A Postmodern Critique of Evangelicalism

The writers of The Book of Mormon musical answer the question: “What does the world think of Christians?” Their response is a melodic, witty, and uproarious put-down. Note: This post contains spoilers.  I watched The Book of Mormon on Broadway with my two teenage sons. My second son picked the show and I thought it would be stupid. Who wants to watch a musical satirizing Mormonism? It doesn’t seem very entertaining. Full disclosure: I also thought Alexander Hamilton’s life was a stupid musical idea. However, Trey Parker, Matt Stone, and Robert Lopez (hereafter abbreviated as PSL), are comedic geniuses. Their collaboration is incredible. It is a pop culture masterpiece -  ruthlessly satirical, hilarious, and wondrous. In short, my boys and I loved it.  I was interested in how I would respond to a work that attacks faith, in particular Mormonism but in general, all religious faiths. And make no mistake: Mormonism is the writers’ primary target but their critique condemns the

Asians, Intelligence, and Facts

Confirmation bias and cognitive dissonance about Asians being better at math Few topics stir up more debate than the discussion of ethnic differences in cognitive ability. One of my favorite books, The Bell Curve , has been and in the past year has become again a lightning rod of controversy. The book and its ideas are arguably more relevant today than when it was first published twenty-five years ago. The co-author, Charles Murray, has been labeled a white supremacist and his recent speaking engagements have been subject to violent protest at Middlebury College and my alma mater, UC Berkeley.  I listened to Murray on Sam Harris’ podcast recently and he published the following summary from The Bell Curve in response to listener interest. Below is an excerpt of the chapter summary on Asian ethnic differences in cognitive ability: East Asians (e.g., Chinese, Japanese), whether in America or in Asia, typically earn higher scores on intelligence and achievement tests than white Ame

4 Truths Fat People Can Teach the Church

I judge fat people.  I assume they’re lazy and weak-willed. I want to bring attention to their obesity in case they weren’t yet aware. I’m tempted to lecture them about obesity’s effect on our health care system. I want to remind fat people of the statistics - I’m especially critical of fat people who frequent fast food restaurants. I want to ask “Are you sure you want to be here? Do you really want to super-size that?” America is a free country but I will absolutely judge the diet of fat people. I also don’t want to sit next to a fat person on the plane. I recall a news story about Samoan airlines charging customers not by seat but by pound. I remember thinking how novel and practical an idea that was. Being of Asian descent is also a disadvantage in accepting larger people. Relative to white people , I am a small, skinny Asian dude and my body type is normative for Asians. I am genetically predisposed against gaining weight. It is therefore easy for me to judge people be

Feminist anthem vs. male ballad

I love DJ Khaled’s "I’m the One". The pop saccharine tune with a chorus of big names (Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance, and Lil’ Wayne) is simple, catchy, has a great rhythm, and an obvious meaning. Bieber croons: Hear you’re sick of all those imitators Don’t let the only real one intimidate ya And there ’ s  a very succinct boast from  Quavo: I make your dreams come true when you wake up   Make no mistake - “I’m the One” is 100% male braggadocio. Feminist anthems are essentially male ballads. Except in a male ballad the man brags about himself without ever saying he’s a man whereas in a feminist anthem, the woman brags about herself by making repeated and explicit references to her womanhood.  Male ballads have been around since like forever. I’m sure there was some caveman who was trying to woo his prospective wife by making up a song and came up with the male ballad. Evolutionary psychology would say the male ballad came from a male's biological imperati