Rant of the Exiles

I like Kay Hymowitz's writing - it can be kinda depressing but it highlights important social trends. About four years ago, I read a great book of her called Marriage and Caste . I'm surprised more people don't reference her work. She was one of the first to describe in detail the marriage gap . Articles about it are everywhere - as recent as this week . College-educated people marry at far higher rates than those who have only a high school diploma or less. People with at least a bachelor's degree also divorce at far lower rates than those less educated. This means we are creating a society where marriage is a filter for the elite and the working class and poor will stay poor due to low marriage rates. This is especially pronounced when viewed across race. In a recent article about the marriage gap's implications on fatherhood, a Pew research report published last year states 44% of black fathers with children under 19 live away from their parents. Thi...

I have a crush on Amy Chua. OK not really. She is insane but man, I loved her book. It felt like a breakthrough to me because she does such a fantastic job dissecting the difference between Chinese and Western parenting and what she did was tremendously helpful in me appreciating being Chinese. That revelation is such a treasure to me. Here is an intelligent, incredibly well-educated, strong, headstrong, stubborn, courageous, ridiculously articulate and intense woman who makes me proud to be Chinese and particularly Chinese American. She helped me appreciate being Chinese in a way only someone who straddles both cultures can. And in the end, she admits to being (almost) as dysfunctional as the rest of us. She’s an amazing writer – very concise and much less pretentious (although every bit as elite) than Ayelet Waldman's Bad Mother. She drops big words occasionally but mostly her prose is terse and easy to read. Its just good. And she’s hilarious – total deadp...

Last week, members of the youth group spent 5 days in the Tenderloin neighborhood of San Francisco. Our host was Youth with a Mission, a great parachurch missions organization. Our team was paired with a youth group from the high desert region of San Bernadino County. It was apparent they're not exposed to many Asians. On one outing, I was placed with four teenagers (all white) from their church. I tried on some sunglasses and a girl commented that I look like Jackie Chan. I jumped onto a wall. A guy said it was just like Jackie Chan. I asked if they knew other Asians that I could be compared with. Oh sure they responded - we know Bruce Lee. In another instance, it was early evening and I was watching a group of our kids on the other side of the street. A black man (who turned out to be quite drunk) passed me jabbering in fake Chinese - "ching chong ding doing". Pushing aside my flashes of rage fantasy, I replied as graciously as I could - "You have a n...

I had a great time yesterday volunteering at CityTeam Ministries with some youth group kids. We were doing some team bonding in preparation for our missions trip to the Tenderloin district of San Francisco. I talked with the person in charge of the recovery center kitchen. Her experience with Christianity, youth, and pastors is radically different from mine. After finding out I was a youth pastor, she said something like wow I’m so glad you’re doing this for the kids because without you, these kids wouldn’t be here. And I thought, actually that’s completely untrue. In fact, the opposite is true. They would probably be volunteering more if it wasn’t for me. She didn’t know anything about the children of well-educated high-tech immigrants and the churches they attend. We are busy with all these activities at church, teach them to reach out to their friends, do bible study, sing, play etc. Two of the kids had just been at CityTeam just a couple weeks before with Key ...

Well, two reasons: First, I had things I wanted to share about things I am learning and passionate about 2) because of these two books: The Long Tail by Chris Anderson and Purple Cow by Seth Godin. They're both great books about technology, change, and leadership. Its about being unique and focusing on your niche. Wanting to live out and convey the gospel as an Americanized Asian in an immigrant church is certainly one such niche.